Finding your Northstar
I see you (you guys know who you are), and through you I see myself in new ways, from different angles; from a place that is other but still connected. This isn’t the good part, however. When we take the time to see what others see in us we shake up our own narratives; this can then assist in identifying our internally driven stories that are untrue or do not serve us anymore. As well, this interactive reflection can also help us develop and celebrate our stories of personal success and love, which is so critical to living a rich life.
Maybe more importantly, however (and this is the good part), this re-evaluation of the stories we tell ourselves, can provide a healthy distance that allows us to reconnect to our values. As I was re-listening to Rich Roll and guest Susan David the idea of being driven by our VALUES vs. NARRATIVES was soooo powerful. I often reevaluate my narrative’s but I realize now that I have continued to let them, even the “good ones,” remain in the driver seat, which will only get me so far.
Our stories are vehicles we can use to express our values but they are not as powerful as our values themselves. For example, if I believe I am worthy what is the foundation of that belief? What have I done to be worth and who decides my actions equal worthiness? If I am worthy because I treat myself and others well and keep my word then I value connection and honesty.
So making decisions based on my values of creating and maintaining connections and speaking truth, will support the fulfillment of my kuleana (responsibility and privilege) and purpose. Whereas, if my starting point is my worthiness then how do I make decisions based on that? More often than not the concept of worthiness will probably put me in very murky waters (as there could be 1001 ideas of what does and doesn’t constitute worthiness) but interconnection and truth are concrete states I can express through action; they can be my Northstar.